Tagged: expectations

Insights-Musings about life and business.

We are all in the same boat. We all are being forced to adapt to the blistering pace of change we see in the world. It’s unsettling, it’s scary, and, worst of all, nobody knows what will happen next. Alvin Toffler predicted that we would live in a state of “cultural anxiety” in Future Shock. Who would have known that what he predicted in 1970 would come true?

For many, death is something to be feared…hence the massive pain we see in the world as we witness the end of the Industrial Age. And why is it that death is promoted as the ultimate “dark” experience? Are we even aware of what is dying?

It appears that the 300 lb. gorilla in the room is that what we have known to be true is not only being questioned, it’s dying. (Kubler-Ross talked about grief in her famous book: On Death and Dying” ).

Fear not…what is dying is what we are conditioned to believe…not life itself.

Life constantly moves forward regardless whether we like it or not. Engaging fully with life is the hard part…especially when we are desperately holding on to the past to make sense out of our future.

Accepting is to let go. It is impossible to truly accept and be fearful.

If you understand the process of grieving you will be on your way to accepting your current circumstance.

The fascinating thing is if you let go, you won’t break. You will be set free.

@chimimimusic

Creating Community: What is your goal?

If you are a business owner, a marketer, a concerned individual or all of the above it probably occurred to you that  “community” is a buzz word that is generally misunderstood depending on where you stand.

Building a community is hard work. And, like any endeavor, without clear goals the chances of success are slim to none.

When defining a goal there are usually more questions than answers. What can easily be missed is in this process is the underlying intent behind the action.

Are you honest with yourself about why you want to build a community? Is it for money? Is it to satisfy your ego? Is it altruistic? Is it to amass power?

It can be all or none of the above.

Beyond understanding the building blocks needed to create a community (barrier to entry, influence, shared emotional values etc), it is important to be clear about your underlying motivation as well. Clarity of purpose (intent) and motivation will guide your every move going forward. Success will require following a predetermined  road map along with enough gas in the tank to get you there. Intent and motivation provides the fuel needed to make the journey.

It’s a funny thing about human beings: we all perceive information differently and to a large degree will spin information so that it falls in line with existing beliefs (confirmation bias).
In “Blink” Malcolm Gladwell talks about our innate ability to determine truth from fiction based upon facial muscles, instinct, context etc. No longer is “do as I say, not as I do” a valid strategy. This falseness will be apparent to everyone. Like “The Emperor’s New Clothes”, let’s hope you are not the last to know.

Building a sustainable community requires being clear about your intent and motivation. The quickest way to discover that is to look inward with honesty. Your audience/community will then be able to determine if the value you offer warrants their attention. If they choose to participate it will because they perceive that membership is of higher value than the real or implied “barrier to entry”.

@chimimimusic  

Messaging and branding-Relationships

Relationships.
If someone walks into the room and feigns surprise and acts like they know me i have to immediately decide if I know them or not and what is the basis of the relationship. If I act like i don’t know them invariably the person will seek to provide context to help jog my memory.
This is where it gets interesting.
Do I play along and act like I know them? Or, do I politely say that I don’t know them or what they are talking about. This is a critical juncture. Your choices at this moment will impact the future of the relationship. If you tell the truth you will be building the foundation of an authentic relationship. Anything but the truth will create a false foundation upon which nothing of value will be gained by either party.

Adding another layer of “politeness” to mask the truth of the situation You will be doing both parties a disservice and sow the seeds of future problems. Politeness is not the same as being respectful.

There is more value to be gained from being truthful than being disingenuous…for you and those around you.
Pay attention.
Get to the point.
Be clear
Be respectful
Don’t waste your time with denial.
When life seems overwhelming most of us tend to hide out…to avoid addressing obvious truths.

Use truth and respect as a springboard towards both personal and business growth.

@chimimimusic

A Sense Of Community

What is community? How do we define it? Do we actually know what it is? Ever thought about why we as humans think it is important? With a big h/t to Greg Lexiphanic here are a few thoughts to consider. I will try to paraphrase this great ebook. For more detail please go here

Key criteria to establish a “sense of community” (as defined by David McMillan & David Chavis- “sense of community: a theory and definition”) are:

1. Membership 2. Influence 3. Fulfilment of needs 4. Shared emotional connection.

For a community to exist members must experience a sense of community.

How can you create a community around who you are, your business, your interests? Take the time to understand how these 4 elements relate to each other and what they mean individually.

Membership implies exclusivity (a barrier to entry or boundary). Either you are in or you are out. Implied in membership is a trust that you will be safe and taken care of within the boundaries and definitions of the group.

Influence is gained by having an affecting change on the group. Influence is only achieved by listening as well as expressing your beliefs.

“People who acknowledge that others’ needs, values, and opinions matter to them are often the most influential group members, while those who always push to influence, try to dominate others, and ignore the wishes and opinions of others are often the least powerful members.” —McMillan & Chavis, 1986

The fuel to drive a community is reinforcement. To receive reinforcement requires participation by the members. If participation focuses on the betterment of the group then reinforcement and a “sense of community” can be achieved. it is a two way street of give and take within the boundaries created by the group. No matter which side of the coin you are on (giving or receiving), if you feel fulfilled by taking part, the group will fill satisfy your need to belong and a bond will develop.

Shared Emotional Connection. There is a great line from the film Local Color that talks about art: “A shared experience is more meaningful than one experienced alone.”

Why is it we seek out group experience rather than isolation?

Intimacy, acknowledgement, sharing of views in a defined format, reward for your investment of time and energy and spiritual bonding ties us together in groups creating a more powerfulexperience than trying to do it alone. Its why we identify with an join groups in the first place. We are tribal animals…it is intrinsic to our nature.

Attempting to create an online or offline community is difficult and time consuming. However, the rewards can be far outweigh the investment. The pot of gold will come from the bonds you create in your community.

Look at your business and personal relationships. Question the drivers and quality of the interactions, what value you derive from feeling connected and reward you receive in return.. Most of us blithely stumble into situations that are driven by habit and conditioning rather than conscious thought.

The opportunity for all of us who are interested in creating community is not only to succeed but also the learn more about ourselves.

  @chimimimusic  

Thought for the day.

I had a conversation last night about giving. It is a curious thing-giving. If you really think about it when you give with love the intrinsic rewards far outweigh what is received. As a result the reward is in the giving not the receiving…
Give with out expectation…be grateful for whatever comes back.

BTW-Today is my brother’s birthday. Happy Birthday Craig.

“Be the best you can be-that is all you can ask of yourself”

In these uncertain times I often think back on how I got to this place and date in my life.

I guess this all goes back to my Mom. Why is this relevant to music?

Being and living the life of an artist in these times is uncertain at the least and extremely challenging at best. It is the lessons learned in childhood that shape how and what you will become later in life.

Mom would use these phrases, among others, to reassure when I had my doubts:

“Be the best you can be-that is all you can ask of yourself”

“Giving is the same as receiving”

” Your talent is a gift-honor that gift-don’t take it for granted”

Mom didn’t really understand music but she did understand people and life.

I’ve had many, many challenges in my life. I’ve had to reinvent myself numerous times, push through my uncertainties and face my fears…all in search of being the best musician I could possibly be. My defense was this: “if I always did my best and it didn’t work out I could walk away from the success or failure with a clear conscience…I could do no more.

Now I can’t say I’ve always been successful…but I will say this: Regardless of whether I reached my goal or not, I have always learned something…maybe not what I expected.

In every situation we are faced with a choice: “Do we just get by? Or do we choose the best solution-regardless of the cost personal or emotional?”

Me? I seem to take the latter rather than former….with out regret. The “easy” way out has not been an option.

The reward? It has always served me well to the “best that I can be”-that is all I can ask of myself.

http://www.chrisboardmanmusic.com
http://www.myspace.com/cbpianoproject